Now I don't know about the rest of ya's, but thanks to my stellar scheduling abilities and blessings, this Queer's first week of classes for the semester has come to a clippity-clappity close. Yeah...I don't have Monday OR Friday and classes once again. I know you're jealous. And I think I like that. Here's my week at a glance just to give a little run-down of this fabulous semester I have constructed.

The locations have been blacked for my propagating multitude of stalkers. But I'm sure if you are just damned determined enough you can find me and continue your creeping. My only rule is look, don't touch - unless you're hot. Then you may touch. Where were we? Oh yes, end of first week. So something you may not know about me, I like to go to the circus, I like to play whack-a-mole orrrr pound-the-beaver and I am on the UA Forensics Council. Should you not be familiar, that is basically speech and debate team and what-have-you. I am the fresh meat this semester and have been hard at work to put up my first piece ( giggles encouraged.) I am doing a Dramatic Interpretation of "Fruit Cocktail" by Tim Miller. It's a coming out and first love tale from one of the greatest performance artists of our time - one of the NEA 4 for anyone whose suffered and through and possibly retained any TH 114.  I actually just got back from meeting with one of my coaches to work through the details so that I may give that queer's work some damn justice. Perhaps I'll video it for you? Otherwise I honestly don't believe you get the idea nor care. I sure as hell wouldn't.

And let me just tell you, I have joined the Resolutioners at the Rec for a little one-stop bodyshop.  Young Heath, my roommate/caretaker, says he has joined the initiative, but he's only been twice. No scratch-and-sniff sticker for his fatass. We typically get up at 6 and go for Yoga with Barb on Tues/Thurs. Let me just tell you Barb is a fabulous little hippie lady. And MWF are running and machine days. It's all really invigorating and starts my day out right. Initially, we had signed up for a class the mornings of MWF. It was simply called "Water with Joanna." We assumed fun swim time and splashing and wet bodies. No. "Water with Joanna" entails scantily-clad obese white woman well past their prime canoodling on noodles, wiggling, and jiggling. I will be flacid for months to come. So Heath went home to cry and I hopped on a treadmill to make the pain go away. Can't wait to see the results.

I am now about to jet off for a light din-din before Rock the Runway rehearsals with the fabulous Misster Mackey. I hope you ALL will be in attendance next Thursday evening, January 21 8PM in the Ferg Ballroom. More details and inside scoops to come next week. Pencil it in on your calendars, but for now, this Queer is hawngry.

Over and Out,
CampusQueer