I'm pissed. Have you seen the CW today? Yes, the student paper here at the University of Alabama. An opinions column entitled, "Gays should stress similarities" written by a student, Michael Patrick ran that basically says, "Well gays need to be more like straight people - "normal." Go ahead and have a read here:





Well screw "normal" cause I'm about to go TRANNY on this shit. Stereotype much Mister Patrick? Generalize much Mister Patrick? Take things way out of context Mister Patrick? Talk about something you can't and never will understand Mister Patrick? I appreciate the way you try to throw with your positive quips, but you really just kinda FUCK. IT. UP. when you follow through with, "it is not okay to subscribe yourself to a ridiculous lifestyle and blame it on the fact that you are gay."

All this really just makes me more of a Pissy Patty because its LGBT History Month. It's a time to celebrate our strides in equality and here this dumbass goes broadcasting some spew about how we need to conform to the "heteronormative." Bitch, we have been conforming to the "heteronormative" for thousands of years. Oh, and let's not stop with the gays. Let's make sure we include everyone who leads a "ridiculous lifestyle" and have them conform to something even BETTER. Yes, let's all eat our tuna fish sandwiches and iron down the pleats of our ill-fitting khakis and join the "Straight-White-Male-Middle-Class-Normative." It's going to be super fun I guarantee.


And I was doing okay. I was not seething perhaps as I read this garbage. 'Til the end. That one line really cut your place out buddy. "Gays in America need to make a culture adjustment; otherwise the next time a homosexual teen commits suicide, they might be holding the rope." I could expand on this, but I trust your intellects queerlings. That is not okay. 


I trust this young fellow has never endured "gay bullying." In his mind, it's no different than any other bullying. Well Mister Patrick, let me put it into perspective for you. Imagine you are young, and already feeling so different; that you are possibly the only person who likes the same sex and confused about what is going on in your head. And everyone else can see it. Imagine being bullied so bad JUST first and second grade, that you begin a chain of changing schools every year because his parents don't know where he can go where he won't have to face harassment. People say kids that age don't know what "gay" and "fag" mean. Maybe they don't understand it, but they sure as hell have heard it from their older straight parents or through MEDIA that shows them what it means to be a NORMAL straight person. And they see someone different and USE it against them. 


Michael Patrick, your article was written in complete bias with no shame. You feign understanding only to unmask yourself with provincialism, elitism, and bigotry. So keep an eye on your doorstep. If you don't watch hard enough, we may show up in our speedos, body glitter, and a tape deck blaring "Boys, Boys, Boys" by Our Lady. We may even start having a promiscuous orgy and snorting cocaine off a drag queen's inner thigh. I hope for your NORMAL sake that you aren't slightly turned on.




EDIT: 


So I've recently been tweeted that Mister Patrick is also a gay man. Wow. You really did us all a good one there. You sure did a damn fine job of assimilating because you had me purely convinced you were straight. How about a gold star for you? Hey, next time you want to set us back a few hundred years again, you just come around and personally kick us all in the balls/ovaries? That would be lovely. 


You personally reinforced the use of stereotypes against your own community in a public forum for a campus that already harbors anti-gay sentiment and just gave them the support to keep doing what they do. Thanks man. Really. Looks like I'm going to need to "up my homo" to make up for you. I'm thinking heels and giant white wings on campus. That should do the trick.


Over and Out,
CampusFuckingQueer