These dumb bitches. How hard is it to follow common etiquette for sidewalk passage? Don't think it exists?  Then you are probably part of the problem. We have for driving on public roads with the dotted, spotted, blotted yellow lines. The same rules apply for walking on sidewalks. Stay on your side. That leaves room for oncoming pedestrians to continue on their merry way without having that horribly awkward, "Oh god, how do I pass this dumb fuck?" and you both teeter on your little feets fretting who is going to go which way.

Another common tool we use on our road systems of America is speed limits. Limits are not necessarily relevant for sidewalks, but a common accepted speed is quite so. Moping along, shuffling your feet? I'll run your dumbass over. I got some child-bearing hips that will most certainly be-bop your ass right damn out of my way. I got places to go. Let's keep it brisk folks.

I really hope my readers are the kind of people that understand these common rules of etiquette. I really, really hope my readers are the type chortling in agreement. I super really hope if you ARE the type of person I am targeting that you can stop being a naughty little pedesrtrian and modify your bad habits. Or there's a spanking in store for you.

Over and Out,
CampusQueer